LIFE SUCKS.

The last two days were very tough and emotional. I've learned a lot of things about life. Life sucks. BUT God is steady through all of it.

We all know that the economy is just not doing so well all over the world. This means that a lot of places are making drastic changes. Changes that will alter someone's life.

Thursday morning I was asked a very tough question by my two bosses. They told me that every department are making cuts and they need to too. So, they wanted to know what my thoughts are and asked me to choose whether or not I want to keep at full time or go down to part time. This was tough because I was picking fate for either my life or the life of the other full time accountant on staff.

To make a long story short, I've decided to stay on full time, while the other accountant was told the bad news of going to part time which means losing ALL benefits and decrease in pay. I feel so horrible because so many things comes into play for this and for her. TRUST ME...one of the toughest decisions I had to make.

Then the news kept coming about other people being let go. All which are my good friends. Friends that goes beyond just working together. Friends that I have shared life with. Friends that makes me want to go to work in the mornings. Friends that makes even the worst day at work so great. I've lost them. All of them. I've cried over the loss of these people. As I'm writing this, my eyes are welling up. I am so sadden by all of this. A chunk of my heart has been taken away.

Although I am so GRATEFUL that I have a job during this time, I am sad, frustrated, angry and burdened by the fact that I will no longer see my friends on a daily basis.

2009 is a year of change. With that comes excitement. With excitement comes the realization of how GREAT our God is.

Monday morning, when I walk through the those doors, I will no longer see my friend with her smiley face at the front desk. I am probably going walk down the hallway to go see my other friend to ask how her weekend went only to see her empty desk. Then probably text her to see if she's going to be coming in later that day. I will be eating lunch alone. I won't have anyone to complain to. It's going to be so different.